Playing “Spot the Difference”: How We Create Our Own Blindspots & How We Can See Around Them

We can prejudge those we don’t know at all, making assumptions about their personalities, beliefs and private lives before we even meet them. They may be strangers we pass on the street, the lady standing in front of you at the cashier or the kids playing basketball at the park.

We may make assumptions based on gender (Men are like this; women are like that), their clothes, the way they speak or the colour of their skin.

But if we meet someone new with the intention of really getting to know the whole person, we listen when we talk.

We look and listen better and sometimes see things that that person’s oldest friends and family don’t see. Why is that?

We can get stuck seeing each other in shorthand. We might always see one another as we were when we were kids. That’s fine if we are still seeing the best and it brings out the best in both of us, but not so good if it prevents us from seeing our truer complete selves – or if it prevents our relationship from evolving.

Aunts and uncles notice when kids have grown and matured from year to year, but when we stop growing on the outside, our family might assume there’s been no change on the inside.

To see outside of the tight box we have mentally drawn around the people most familiar to us requires time and intention. Look beyond the borders of the box – beyond appearances.

Look and listen for change and growth, and you may surprise one another by seeing someone familiar in a whole new light. You will have spotted the difference.

Coming up: Have you prejudged yourself? Are you stuck in your own box?


About Davidicus Wong

I am a family physician. I write a weekly newspaper column, Healthwise for the Vancouver Courier, Burnaby Now, Royal City Record and Richmond News.
This entry was posted in Growth, Positive Change, Positive Potential, Relationships and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

7 Responses to Playing “Spot the Difference”: How We Create Our Own Blindspots & How We Can See Around Them

  1. Good post. Much wisdom is within it. 🙂

    Have a pleasant day!

  2. mysterycoach says:

    Well AMEN! Tell it like it is! Families and old friends do often times put one another in a box because they keep bring up the past and you’re absolutely correct when you say how we can put people in a box. Love this… absolutely love this.

  3. mysterycoach says:

    Reblogged this on MysteryCoach and commented:
    This is David and I’ve been following him quite a while. Always has excellent pearls of wisdom to share. 🙂

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