How Do You See Yourself?

If you spend too much time worrying and fussing over your looks, you can be sure that no one else is looking at you as closely as you do.

We can focus excessively on some feature of our appearance (such as a freckle or mole, our height or weight, our body type, the colour of our skin or hair, the straightness or curl of our locks, the shape and symmetry of our facial features, the size of our ears, and the appearance of our feet), and that obsessive attention can be a source for unhappiness.

When it comes to our own appearance, we lose all objectivity. We tend to overestimate how much others really notice when they see us. It’s likely that few people notice your minor imperfections and those who do likely don’t care. This is particularly true with the people who really care about you. The features you dislike in yourself may be those that your family and friends love the most.

We have to stop comparing ourselves to the beautiful people (or rather their images) on magazine covers and on the big screen. None of us looks like Tom Cruise . . . except Tom Cruise, and he probably doesn’t look quite like the polished persona depicted in Mission Impossible.

No one looks like Scarlett Johannsen . . . maybe not even Scarlet Johannsen in the morning before make up.

Abraham Lincoln said, “God must have loved the plain people: he made so many of them.”

We are all human and imperfect, but we can still be beautiful in our imperfection. Love yourself just as you are; others do.


About Davidicus Wong

I am a family physician. I write a weekly newspaper column, Healthwise for the Vancouver Courier, Burnaby Now, Royal City Record and Richmond News.
This entry was posted in Happiness and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

5 Responses to How Do You See Yourself?

  1. Grace Chandy says:

    Re: How do you see yourself?
    Beautifully written – Thank you. I enjoy reading your thought provoking articles.
    Grace Chandy (past BBY personnel)

  2. mysterycoach says:

    I’ve always noticed how on a day where I may not feel like my personal best or I’m not wearing make up, no one else really notices at all. I don’t literally “look” for the attention. One time years ago, my hair was all foo, just really came out sticking up in odd places and not coming out right. I felt funny and was all annoyed. And golly gee waldo! No one noticed … the only person who gave it any thought was me. Those who did give it thought, or could have, seriously would need something else to do.

    I watch people compare themselves to other ALL the time… and I do mean ALL the time. My thought process was always “why”? I tell all the women i know this, I tell my daughter this too.

    At what juncture… does someone else have something we do not because they “look” perfect. Oh no… that’s WAY far from the truth. It’s really “here” (put your hand on your chest and mind) that matters the most.

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