A number of years ago – long after we had become adults, my childhood friend, Stan pointed out a salient feature of our friendship – how to him it was different from any other. I didn’t realize ’til then that in my closest friendships, there was a quality absent from how most guys relate to one another.
When I got married and I introduced my oldest friend, Stew to family, some were surprised that we had maintained a close friendship over so many years – since kindergarten. It didn’t seem strange to me. I thought I was just lucky to have a friend for life.
As a young adult, I wondered why my own siblings didn’t have friendships like these that began in elementary school and continued without wavering to the present. They each had many friends from every stage of their lives: soccer friends, university friends, med school friends, but with each major change in their lives, they would drift apart and their best friends changed.
I wasn’t really comparing myself to them. Well, maybe – as it usually is with siblings – I was, but I envied their more outgoing natures and ability to make new friends quickly. I thought that my shyness was the difference and that when I finally found great friends, I stuck with them.
Next: The Difference is Depth.